In 2014, I resigned from serving as the Chairperson of the SPCA Vereeniging after 7 years of active involvement. Impending menopausal moods and animal welfare do not go hand in hand, so the decision was made with the best interests of the SPCA in mind. I can admit that the decision hurt. I had spent so much time there, and the staff felt like family to me. I look back on those 7 years, and all I feel is admiration for the people who work there. The pressure is sometimes unreal, and very hard decisions are made that tear hearts apart. The staff don’t have the luxury of walking away like I did, and knowing the problems that they have to face, I felt obligated to continue assisting them and the community in some way. I know that unwanted litters of puppies and kittens are a huge problem in our area. Animals are multiplying at a rapid rate, especially in the townships. Sterilization fees are high, coupled with many people living hand to mouth, there isn’t a remote possibility of having animals sterilized, so the problem of overpopulation keeps escalating. With all these factors weighing on my mind, I started the” 50 Shades of Spay” initiative. I had just turned 50, and I wanted to do something to commemorate my 50th year of existence. The first book of the trilogy, 50 Shades of Grey, had hit the market with a bang. I thought my play on words was rather ingenious, and so the name of “50 Shades of Spay” was born.
With every century I made, I have tried to do something that I would celebrate and remember that specific year by. I recall my 40th, which was celebrated by running the Two Oceans Marathon (and coming last). So, I opted for the more artistic and less strenuous version of celebrating half a century. My initial goal was to do it for a year and see if I could sterilize at least 50 animals. Little did I know what was waiting for me… but let me not get ahead of myself.
As I am an avid home baker, I decided to bake cakes and “sell” them to my friends and family. The payment for these cakes were deposited directly into the vet or chosen organization’s account so it could be utilized solely for the purpose of sterilization. Everybody needs a cake now and then, and that is how I motivated the spay initiative. By “buying” a cake, you are sterilizing an animal, and how can this not be a good thing? Eat and spay.
This escalated as word got around, and people loved the idea of having their cake and eating it. I’m not shy to say that my creations taste absolutely heavenly, and this has also helped the cause. To date (nearly 10 years later), the scrumptious cakes have paid for the sterilization of many animals and probably added many pounds to people’s weight. They certainly get the job done. Being the true cake goddess that I am, I like being given a theme and then let loose. Working according to a picture just gets me in trouble, so I don’t venture there.
I recently asked an animal spiritualist to say a special prayer for all my animals, and when she asked for their names, I was amazed and frankly a little scared by the number of animals in my family. Once you have to write all the names down, it is a reality check, and the weight of being responsible for so many lives can actually scare you. Our family consists of 7 dogs, 5 cats, 4 horses, 3 donkeys, 2 sheep, 3 goats, and last but not least, there are 5 humans. All my animals are sterilized, vaccinated, dewormed, and microchipped, even the outreach dogs. I have absolutely no intention of ever allowing any of them to contribute to the problems of overpopulation.
Most of my furry family are rescues, with the exception of three of the horses. They are all pets and have been retired for many years. Even though we have so many animals, everybody is family and they are treated as such.
I am very privileged to stable my horses, goats, sheep, and donkeys on a beautiful plot situated about 7 km from our house. This land was procured by a lot of complaining from the husband (now called Saint Christopher for his saintliness), but in the end, my perseverance won.
Whilst “50 Shades of Spay” is a community-driven sterilization program, I have also assisted with the odd adoption or two… maybe more. Adopting a rescue is one of the most rewarding and unselfish things that a person can do. Adopting a senior pet is, of course, a sure way to ensure that you get a flying pass through the pearly gates. There are so many unwanted animals waiting for the opportunity to show you how grateful they are for giving them a second chance – why not consider the options when you are looking to expand your family? If your motivation is that you want a purebred animal, please check for availability with your local shelter or even with the breed-specific page on social media. There is a rescue organization for nearly every breed, and involve your children with your choices and motivations for doing so as they learn from their parents and will hopefully be motivated to do the same when they are adults one day.
We have to change and adapt to the people around us and the circumstances that are ever-changing. Through “50 Shades of Spay”, the poverty-stricken areas became my reason for starting community outreach. It all happened by following stray dogs home. I would spot a dog on the side of the road, and as they were not keen on getting in my car, I would follow them until they finally went home. These dogs would go scavenging for food during the day, but they would return to their homes at night. That’s where I got to see how people are struggling to survive. No water, no electricity, just making do with the little they have. That’s how outreach started. I just eased into dropping a few things off now and then, then sterilizing the dogs, taking food for the animals as they had become part of my ‘extended family’. Once again, my friends were roped in, and they donated all their unused goods to me. So, 8 years later, every six weeks I load up my Goanywherevehicle, attach the trailer that is filled with all donated goods, foods, beds for dogs, and blankets. I have a fixed route that I follow, and the family dogs know my car, so each stop is heralded by unbridled excitement and loads of barking. Over the years, I have seen the children go from babies to teenagers, and parents grow old. My outreach families have become part of my life.
Being involved in animal welfare has taught me that we save one animal at a time, put one foot in front of the other, always trying to move forward. Once evening I was filling my car with diesel at a station situated in Meyerton. It was quite late and there were a few people sitting on the park benches eating their supper. Obviously workers that had to finish the night shift taking a break. While waiting for the tank to be filled, I noticed quite a few cats lurking in the vicinity. They were very thin and looked neglected. What really caught my attention was a small black kitten that was literally begging for table scraps. I got out and put a few pellets down that I had in my car. The kitten rushed to the food and devoured as much as he could before the older cats chased him away. This was my first encounter with Joe Black. His story will follow shortly as he deserves a whole chapter to himself. That encounter took place somewhere in 2017. Since then, I have been feeding and trapping the feral cats at Model Bottle Store. There are 4 feeding stations and sleeping quarters that are topped up and cleaned every 10 days. The inclusion of the feral cats was not planned, it just happened, but they are now proudly part of “50 Shades of Spay”. Joe Black became so tame that during lockdown, the police patrolling the area told me he was going to be eaten if he stayed. Without having a plan, I went and collected him and brought him home. Today, he is part of the Wilde household, lounging on the sofa and demanding to be fed every time he sees me. It has all just fallen into place because it was meant to be.
Baking cakes, each and every one of them, has given me pleasure, but also the knowledge that, together with the cake-eating fraternity out there, we are saving an animal at a time. Good enough for me.
I have met such great people, ordinary folk who have touched my life and inspired me daily, too many to mention. “50 Shades of Spay” is not about me; it is about the generosity of people, the greatness of my vet, Dr. Hennie Boonzaaier, the struggle of all the people in animal welfare, and bringing relief to people in my immediate community in a small way. I love a challenge and have been asked to make some weird and wonderful cakes. I think the most challenging one to date was the penis cake, as somebody wanted a penis cake for a bachelorette party. I traveled the length and breadth of the Vaal Triangle looking for a pan in the form of a penis. There was none.
Briony was given the task of locating a penis pan in Johannesburg. The poor child phoned every baking shop she could find with the help of the University of Google. No luck.
Then one afternoon, I was driving in the busy section of our small town when I noticed a sex shop on a corner. Would they possibly have the required pan? I wouldn’t know until I asked… I parked my car and hopped out. My plan was to dash into the shop and hope none of my friends (or enemies) would see me. The problem was that the door worked on a buzzer system. You had to buzz and be let in after being verified by a camera. It was lunchtime, and the area was busy. I buzzed, and nothing happened. I buzzed again, this time a little longer, as I was starting to feel very exposed and a little frantic. Nothing happened. To my utter dismay, a woman came walking up to me and said, “They are on lunch, dearie. What are you looking for?” This “lady” looked like she could give me much more than a pan for the right price…
Mortified, I answered: “I am looking for a penis pan.” Her face said it all, even before she answered: “This is NOT a cake shop…”
I just turned around and left but not before a friend drove by and enthusiastically hooted at me. I felt like the entire community had driven past me in those few minutes. In the end, I found a penis pan. Too late for the bachelorette, and it is still in my pan cupboard. I sometimes wonder what my housekeeper thinks when she cleans out that cupboard. I still have to try my hand at that cake…just saying. A friend once made the a comment that the name of “50 Shades of Spay” should be renamed to “50 Shades of Compassion”. I should have thought if of that when I started, but to be honest, it was only supposed to be running for a year in 2014. Shit happens…
Where is all this going? Nobody knows. Only time will tell. I have become a part of so many wonderful lives, seen so many acts of kindness, and lived through so many sorrows with the people who have shaped my life over the past 10 years. We went through a lockdown when nobody was allowed to travel (and I did just so I could feed the animals and the people) and witnessed babies being born, as well as animals and people leaving their earthly bodies. We have experienced happiness and sadness together. I have occasionally lost my composure, but then found myself again. Throughout it all, I don’t regret a single day. I am getting older, and it is becoming a little harder to perform like I used to, so I have scaled down my activities a bit. Scaling down doesn’t mean quitting; I can’t do that to the people and animals who rely on the visits of the Goanywherevehicle. There is still a lot to be done.
In the past 10 years, I have lost count of the animals that we have spayed. Should I have to venture a guess, it would be in the thousands. Together, the community, friends, and everybody who cares have assisted many people whose animals have fallen ill, been poisoned, hit by a car, or gotten hurt and couldn’t afford the services of a vet. It started with cake, and look where it has taken us.
I say cake for president. That’s all.
